BEING STUCK IN ONE PLACE ISN’T ALWAYS A BAD THING

AUDIO PODCAST OPTION OF MY ARTICLE BEING STUCK IN ONE PLACE ISN’T ALWAYS A BAD THING

I am kind of a homebody. I love staycations, contemplating a fire in our fireplace, watching a home movie and enjoying the ability to pause for a snack or bathroom break (even with TP being a growing scarcity), or just reading a book with a cat in my lap. BUT nothing makes me want to leave faster than being told I CAN’T leave. And our governor has decreed that there is now a MANDATORY requirement to VOLUNTARILY self isolate.  Putting aside the inherent oxymoron, I more than understand everyone else’s anxiety.

So I decided, rather than fret over this bizarre situation, to suggest a few movies about being stuck in one spot.

Now, as you peruse my choices, know that I am aware of other movies which might seem more obvious.

SPOILERS

Three I would NOT recommend at this time:

Saw invites a guy to hack his foot off.

Cast Away is an a-theized version of Robinson Crusoe. I’m not saying Cast Away openly advocates for an atheistic philosophy, but the original Robinson Crusoe, on which the writers draw heavily in concept, was about a spiritually damaged man who comes to realize his enforced isolation as Providence. Crusoe uses his time as an opportunity to rediscover his relationship with God. On the other hand Cast Away is just about Tom Hanks surviving on an island.

Buried is just too grim to talk about.

So without further ado these are what I think are five great movies that show BEING STUCK IN ONE PLACE ISN’T ALWAYS A BAD THING.

REAR WINDOW

This classic gem from Alfred Hitchcock stars the icon of cinema, Jimmy Stewart, in one of his historically memorable performances as a man with a broken leg, before the age of ubiquitous air conditioning, internet, cell phones or streaming movies, stuck in his apartment during a hot summer and bored out of his mind. The only things he has to occupy himself with are peeping at his neighbor across the way from his apartment and the occasional visits from his girlfriend Grace Kelly. Point of trivia and irony: One neighbor is played by Raymond Burr. Two years later Burr would become Perry Mason, the eponymous lead in an extremely popular courtroom drama TV show, in which this part brilliant lawyer part inquisitive detective, would weekly successfully and justly defend an innocent man who everyone else thinks guilty.

Stewart’s character peeps in on his neighbors and surmises from circumstantial evidence that Burr has murdered his wife. Getting anyone to believe him or prove it becomes a rather tall order as he is stuck in his apartment at a time long before the term handicapped access was even created.

The movie was later remade into a vehicle for the paralysed and wheelchair bound Chris Reeves, who, in an act of sheer inspiring determination, not only lead but, incredibly, directed the film. While I have not yet seen Superman’s version, it is on my bucket list.

BEING STUCK IN ONE PLACE MIGHT HELP YOU SOLVE A MURDER!

APOLLO 13 (1995)

WHO SHOULD WATCH:

This one has some profanity including blasphemy and a few instances of verbal sexual innuendo meant comically. Also, for those old enough to understand the jargon and circumstance, though the men involved face this grimmest of situations with calm and dignity, it is quite tense. So young teens at earliest, especially since younger crew who did not fully appreciate the gravity (or lack thereof) of the space hazards would likely get bored.

This is the telling of the historical and harrowing event which took place from April 11 through 17, 1970 known as the Apollo 13 mission, which was to have been the third lunar landing by the United States. When an oxygen tank catastrophically failed the mission parameters changed to simply trying to return the crew alive.

Even those familiar with the story will be on the edge of their seats as most of the movie is seen from inside the claustrophobically small cabin. Starring Tom Hanks (Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood, Sully, and many more terrific movies, many also biopics), Kevin Bacon (most famous for Footloose), Bill Paxton (Aliens, Twister), Gary Sinise (Forrest Gump) and Ed Harris (The Rock, The Right Stuff) – these men portrayed those who really DID have The Right Stuff with a courage, patriotism and dignity which helped a new generation understand why the space race is worth the risks we take.

BEING STUCK IN ONE  PLACE CAN HELP DEMONSTRATE THE COURAGE, DETERMINATION AND INGENUITY OF THE AMERICAN SPIRIT

SWISS FAMILY ROBINSON (1960)

WHO SHOULD WATCH:

Appropriate for the whole family.

This is a wholesome and inspiring CLASSIC Disney movie based on the Pastor Johann David Wyss’ book about a family, anxious to start a new life in a far away home, who become shipwrecked on an island. The story is of their ingenious survival for a decade with reliance only on their faith in God, each other, and the abundance of raw resources of the uninhabited land far away from any known charts. They tame wild animals, rescue a fair damsel, fight pirates, build a multistory home, and conquer their environment with a plethora of ingenious inventions.

BEING STUCK IN ONE PLACE WITH THOSE YOU LOVE TO CONQUER CHALLENGES CAN DEMONSTRATE YOUR STRENGTH AS A FAMILY

PASSENGERS

I know this movie has gotten a lot of flack over the years for lionizing Stockholm Syndrome and I might have agreed except for one thing:

SPOILERS

Jim gave Aurora an out. He repurposed a biobed into a cyro chamber for her.

I have a full review HERE.

WHO SHOULD WATCH:

Mid teens and up for mild profanities, some semi-comic bare buttocks, some stressful life threatening scenes, and an episode in which the main character becomes so depressed he contemplates suicide.

The story is about a colony ship that glitches 30 years into an 120 year trip leaving one passenger stranded and completely alone among hundreds of other people – who are all asleep in cryogenic chambers. Knowing he is condemned to die alone, after a year he becomes desperate and begins what can be looked at as a parable of marriage.

BEING STUCK IN ONE PLACE CAN TEACH YOU A LOT ABOUT YOURSELF, BOTH GOOD AND BAD

AIRPLANE (1980)

WHO SHOULD WATCH:

NOT FOR THE KIDDIES. Everything from bad language, fart jokes, crude humor and a pair of bare breasts almost LITERALLY thrown in for a moment JUST to achieve an R rating, it’s a classic but for adults only.

OK Let’s go full bore comedy here. This is the prince of parodies, the founder of funny, the superfilm of spoof. On the heels of a decade of airborne disaster melodramas, the Zucker Brothers and Jim Abrahams wrote a movie which incorporated as many clichés, parodies, homages and pokes at this genre as they could possibly stuff into one film. Additionally it featured TV and cinematic legends like Robert Stack, Lloyd Bridges (father of Jeff and Beau), Barbara Billingsley (Leave it to Beaver), and Leslie Neilsen, who had previously been primarily in serious roles, as well as a host of other very familiar faces from old movies and TV Land shows, NOT to mention the Zuckers and Abrahams, the writers. Especially for its time and place, especially for those of us who grew up in the 1950’s and/or were disaster movie afficianados, this was a recipe for rare hilarity. It also stands the test of time. Even if you don’t recognize any of the actors or references this will still tickle your funny bone with its outrageous dead pan deliveries, great timing, unexpected warping of clichés, and the wonderful actors totally committed to turning their comfort zones on their heads.

Many have tried to recapture this lightning in a bottle of mocking a very successful film genre, and many have met with a measure of success – Police Squad, Reno 911 (police TV shows), Disaster Movie (disaster movies), Vampires Suck (Twilight saga), Shaun of the Dead (zombies), Saturday the 14th (Friday the 13th), Spaceballs (Star Wars) –  even using and reusing Leslie Nielsen in some of the ventures. But Airplane was the grand daddy of them all – at least the ancestor with the most fame and clout for their efforts – leading the way with the guts to take on an established genre powerhouse and openly make fun of it.

BEING STUCK IN ONE PLACE CAN BE JUST PLAIN OLD FUNNY

So enjoy your time at home. We usually never have enough of it.  And relish this, what I genuinely believe we will come to later understand as precious moments to:

Be alert, be brave, appreciate your family, learn something about yourself and…laugh.

WHAT TO WATCH WHILE WEATHERING THE WUHAN —–

AUDIO PODCAST OPTION FOR MY ARTICLE: “WHAT TO WATCH WHILE WEATHERING THE WUHAN”

BEFORE WE START – GO WASH YOUR HANDS!!!

Then – I offer you two thoughts.

#1 Whenever faced with an anxiety provoking situation I ask myself: What’s the worse thing that could happen? The answer usually does not warrant my initial visceral knee jerk to whatever the problem at hand is, and it makes me realize I’m overreacting. In short – I tend to be a worry wart and freak out if I let my emotions get the better of me.

#2 Disaster movies are great fun for a number of reasons. (READ Cataclysm as Marital Therapy). But the most relevant reason for this article is: perspective. Having to grit your teeth through another boring meeting at work seems like a paid holiday if you remember you don’t have genocidal aliens hovering in mile wide spaceships over your building waiting for the right moment to incinerate you (“Time’s up” Independence Day). Dealing with a flat tire isn’t so bad when you note you can do it while making all the noise you want without fear of attracting killer monsters (A Quiet Place). Watching a disaster movie can help one embrace the philosophy: “I felt sorry for myself because I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet.”

So given these two thoughts and while we’re all being denied: church services, sporting events, movie theaters, parties, festivals, and hugs, I give you:

FOUR MOVIES TO WATCH WHILE WILING AWAY THE WEEKS WAITING TO WEATHER THE WUHAN

THE ANDROMEDA STRAIN (1971)

One of my all time favorites. Understated and steeped in extrapolated current science fact, the story, based on the book by Michael Crichton, revolves around, not action heroes, but scientists at the top of their fields who tackle an unknown disease which turns blood to powder in moments. Arthur Hill is Dr. Jeremy Stone, expert bacteriologist and government attache who knows of certain hidden agendas. David Wayne is Charles Dutton, pragmatic and old school pathologist who always reminded me of Dr. McCoy. Kate Reid is Ruth Leavitt, curmudgeonly microbiologist with a secret that could endanger the team’s progress. James Olson is James Hall, slightly geeky surgeon, who you could easily believe spent a lot of his teen years playing Dungeons and Dragons. These people were no one’s idea of Avengers but worked as a team against time and an extraterrestrial virus which could cause global cataclysm.

Compared to The Andromeda Strain, the Wuhan is a wimp.

CONTAGION (2011)

Talk about jumping off today’s headlines! Contagion is a movie by Steven Soderburgh whose structure is much like Paul Haggis’ Crash! with multiple storylines woven, like a crocheted serviette, around a central issue which come together to form a whole picture. This movie is chock a block with familiar faces: Matt Damon (Bourne “fill in blank with a variety of nouns”, Good Will Hunting), Kate Winslet (Titanic, Hamlet), Gwenyth Paltrow (in so many Marvel movies with Robert Downey, Jr.’s Iron Man they finally broke down and gave her her own suit, Sliding Doors), Elliot Gould (M*A*S*H, Oceans’ 11, 12, 13, and 8), Jude Law (Fantastic Beasts, Captain Marvel), Laurence Fishburne (Othello, Matrix), Marion Cottillard (Nine, MacBeth), Bryan Cranston (Breaking Bad, Argo), Chin Han (Dark Knight, 2012).

Paltrow is patient zero of a pandemic which has jumped animal DNA from bat to human to become a brain eating, lung congester which kills pretty much every victim we see within 2 days of showing the first flu-like symptoms.

Compared to the bug in Contagion, the Wuhan is a wussy.

OUTBREAK (1995 )

In one of the more formulaic thrillers, we have: the legendary Dustin Hoffman of MANY classic movies (Midnight Cowboy, Little Big Man, Finding Neverland, Tootsie, Rain Man, The Graduate, Marathon Man, Lenny, Papillon, Hero … *whew*), Rene Russo (Lethal Weapon), the disgraced Kevin Spacey, Cuba “Show me the money!” Gooding, Jr. (Jerry Maguire), Donald Sutherland (with a list of 194 credits he’s been in everything from the slapstick Start the Revolution Without Me to Pride and Prejudice), and the ubiquitous Morgan Freeman (Batman, Shawshank Redemption, Bruce Almighty) all struggle to contain an Ebola-like virus which originated in an African jungle, but, through a series of mishaps, infects the town of Cedar Creek, CA. Our intrepid heroes are hampered in their effort to find a cure by forces which want to retrieve the virus so they can turn it into a bioweapon and incinerate the infected town, ostensibly to prevent its spread, but in truth to hide their nefarious plans.

Compared to the buggie in Outbreak, the Wuhan is a weakling, with the added fillip that no one is planning to nuke any towns to get rid of it.

THE STAND (1994)

Done as a miniseries, the book was far better BUT, like Contagion, there is a legion of distinguished standards of both large and small screens as well as theater who ensemble their way through this 6 hour and one minute marathon. Look them up on us.imdb.com and enjoy some of these classic actors’ iconic roles: Gary Sinise (Forrest Gump, Apollo 13), Molly Ringwald (The Breakfast Club, Pretty in Pink), Jamey Sheridan (Sully), Lara San Giacomo (Pretty Woman), the multi-talented stage and film legend Ruby Dee (The Jackie Robinson Story, Raisin in the Sun), another legend Ossie Davis (one of the kings of 1950’s and 1960’s American TV shows from Car 54 Where are You? to Night Gallery, plus films ranging from Do the Right Thing to Grumpy Old Men), Matt (Max Headroom) Frewer, Rob Lowe (The Orville, Saint Elmo’s Fire), Ray (My Favorite Martian) Walston, Ed Harris (The Rock, A Beautiful Mind), Kathy Bates (The Blind Side, Richard Jewell).

The Stand also has a unique twist – after the plague has swept through the world and humanity’s remnants are just starting to put their lives and a fledgling new civilization back together, God and the Devil begin a competition for their souls.

The source book, especially, presents a surprisingly complex and extensive examination of extreme medical phenomena, societal structures, theology, and the internal and external struggles every man faces in choosing between good and evil.

The miniseries begins with an Apocalypse level virus, nicknamed Captain Trips, which wipes out 999 out of every thousand people around the world. In the aftermath, the survivors become the unwilling soldiers in a battle between Hell, represented by Randall Flagg, who sets up shop, appropriately in Las Vegas, NV, and God, represented by Mother Abigail Freemantle, who leads her flock to Boulder, Colorado.

Although the acting is not of uniform quality, many of these veteran character performers, like Sinise, Dee and Davis, shine above the awkwardly truncated story and pedestrian technicals. The soundtrack, by the gifted and prolific Snuffy Walden, has a charming midwestern Americana feel.  

The movie even occasionally uses homages to classic literature such as Of Mice and Men.

Compared to Captain Trips, not only is the Wuhan a walk in the park, it’s a stroll you can take without the incarnation of the Devil himself chasing you in cowboy boots.

So — while you’re quarantined with no: sports, festivals, parties, restaurants, wedding receptions, theater events, movie popcorn, concerts, church fairs, handshakes, confirmations, church services, communal bowls of M&Ms, bridge nights, dances, sci fi conventions, bake sales, open air markets, live opera, or hugs – turn out the lights, choose one of these cathartic gems, confront your worst fears and … count your blessings.

AND WHILE YOU’RE AT IT — GO WASH YOUR HANDS!